All these days of stress and endless boring hours of studying have been creating an hostile athmosphere inside me. I have been complainig and protesting way too much lately because, you know, being locked up in your room day after day studying for upcoming exams while seems like everybody else is having a great time is not a cool position to be in.
Situations like that are the ones where complainig, stressing out, shaming, moaning and feeling bad at everything is the easiest thing to do. But this mornig when I woke up I gave myself a few seconds to actually thing and analyze my behavor towards the situation I am facing. Then I realized that all this negativity is doing to me is making it harder.
I kind of had like a clarity moment and realized how easy and effortless would be to go trough exam period -or any period, just life in general- if I was focusing on the positive and good things in my life and within me rather than in the small-tiny-parts that may not seem as appealing. I can surely assume that that no one likes exams and studing but what about the opportunity I have to actually take those exams? I mean, my mom couldn't attend college because her parents were not able to afford it. Now my parents are giving me the oportinity to do it! This is something I should be celebrating rather than complaing.
And I know for sure that my existence if full of other amazing things that I sould feel blessed about. A tone of things/gifts that should be celebrated every single day of life but that unfortunatelly I tend to take for granted. So I came up with a list. Every thing I could think of that I have the privillege to enjoy in my tiny yet astonishingly lucky existence. I want to state, loud and clear right now, that I will forever be thankful for.
-loving parents
-amazing little sister
-besfriends
-a bed to sleep on
-hot water to shower
-food to eat
-fruit
-acces to clean water
-a roof above my head
-internet acces
-phone and laptop (and mostly all the electronic devices)
-clothes to wear and to keep me warm when it's cold
-strong legs that carry me everywhere
-overall health
-practising rythmic gymnastics and having great teachers
-hard-working spirit
-college
-Harry Potter books and movies
-Justin Bieber
-Raw fruit festival
-american family who I love and apreciate to death
-sewing machine
-unlimited imagination
-braces (did I really say that?)
-flat mate and living whith my best friend
-a home where I feel safe at
-a country there is no war
-freedom
-opinion and freedom of speech
-veganism and the good impact it has on me as a person
-compassion
-animals I share the earth with
-the sun and the moon doing their thing so that we have an optimal enviroment
-simply being alive
....
I certainly know this list could go on and on forever and that is the good thing about it!! I now know that i have absolutely no reason to be/feel unhappy or uncontent in ANY way or aspect of life. Even you if you are reading this meaning that you have internet acces are in probably no different situation than mine here, so please, let's celebrate life! Let's celebrate when life is raw; when it's simple and pleasant but also when it's hard and dark. Let's embrace whatever oportinity we have in front of us and let's make the most of it. Just the fact of being here -alive- is so BIG that not a thing should overshadow it. I love you; I love life; I love MY life. Right now, any time, any moment. And I truly hope YOU feel the same way.
PD: what is it about exam block that I always end up ranting about life in a deep-meaningful-shocking way? haha
Tània.
